Daddy is Home

    • @motiejus I appreciate the offer but I'm not interested

      Yo life is just not as smooth as I want it to be ^^

      Started with the @lnternet issues at the start of November. Before that I was grinding pretty much every day and was more or less in the zone. Then no internet but some well known new coming highstakes cru$her/ ex flatmate/ good friend appeared at my doorstep and we did some poker stuff and hanging out. He likes to bet in the big blind but maybe he's just a bot fish on a heater. Hanging out with some poker people again was really cool, I don't like to talk poker a lot with people outside of i300 because most don't even have the basic thought patterns right, really gave me some motivation and insights how to crush and keep moving forward. However after that this girl and my sister came to visit when he left. Sister just stayed for 3 days or so and we were checking out the city. At some point this other chick was pissing me off and I told her to pack her shit and I get her a plane home the next day. She was opening up after that and apologized and then I was like alright cool and we went to Portugal. The time from there was pretty cool. Tbh learned a lot hanging out with some chick for a longer time. It's a bit different than just going out and fucking some girls and maybe seeing them once a week or so after that.

      during this time we got the internet finally fixed but first I needed to recharge a bit from all that. I usually want to be alone in a basement after I hung out a lot with people for a week, so this was 3 weeks of what I consider hardcore socializing and I learned a lot but needed a couple days just chilling. When I'm out with that chick for example I obv open up etc but I take care to not do weak shit, I get us what we want and solve problems all the time not allowing them to be taken care of later or not at all. Just kind of actually doing what I want at all times. I think that's kind of what you should go for anyway if you don't kill anyone. However doing that 24/7 for 2 weeks is burning a lot of energy if you are not used to that lol. When I'm on my own I also do what I want but sometimes I'm in a restaurant and some shit is missing I'm like "whatever, I'll just not come here again".
      When I'm in a restaurant I don't accept to sit somewhere where I don't feel the most comfortable in that venue and I'll also tell the waiter to get me new stuff when something looks not clean etc or fix something or ask them if they could adjust my meal to include xyz. just kinda normal things that you wish to be done but from my expierence nobody really says anything to get what they want. I'm obv not just some random dickhead trying to get max value it's just a bit more talking and making some jokes sometimes. So I usually do those 3-4 things for myself and my girl kind of also has some things that she would like, so I'll solve those things as well and we are all happy.
      Seems pretty normal when I write it down but I think a lot people are not very aware about those dynamics and rather complain. You can actually say something if you want something different and get that. It was kinda funny how she started realising that this is an option and over the time stood up for herself making things nice for us as well. Although it's just a small thing I really love to see when I can improve someones quality of life.

      So after her I chilled and kind of just started playing Fortnite on my Nintendo Switch and the person I am really wants become better at anything he likes, so I grinded it out leaving everything behind as usual. I didn't play a lot poker but I am decent at Fortnite now ^^ The Switch playerpool is pretty soft so if I play a full day I score about 5-15 wins.

      Anyway I was reflecting about my life this morning because this is obviously not sustainable. A conclusion I come to usually.


      And here we go, I'll be updating again. I think this gaming side is just a part of me and I rather embrace it and live my life in a way where I rather do it as a clear lower priority instead of surpressing that side of me and not doing it at all.
      This will obviously take a shit ton of effort but I want to make sure I consistently put 8 hours a day in poker and I want to be clear about my poker grind times and nothing will ever disrupt that again.

      This last part is very important because I literally took 2 weeks off for that girl/ made a plan for myself to just work 3 hours a day but this can just not be sustainable for me, I can't bend myself just to have more time for someone else. This is I think the biggest thing I learned from that. I'll live my life in a way that I would live anyway and if someone wants to join me for some time they can do it while I do my stuff. I'm not occupied with work all day anyway.

      Girls will also just immediately fuck you over if they see your are not on your path and bending over for them. It's disgusting but more from myself, for them it's just kinda nature.

      I'll keep you guys updated again of how I do. Poker is my frist priority for 8 hours a day. I'll let you know what I did in those 8 hours. Without an solid income stream I can't reach any of my longterm goals, whatever they are. I'll also completely let go of my "schedule". This is one thing that drained so much energy from me for trying to fix it in the last couple years. Poker is the first thing I'm going to take care of when I start the day, I know the best times to grind and whenever I wake up I can manage to put at least 4 hours of grind time each day into those areas and do theory in the rest of the 8 hours.

      After I have done my poker stuff I'll go out and do game for a bit and then I can do whatever I want.

      I also need to take care of the gym situation :D having a fit body makes me feel better in the end :)

      Maybe I start streaming some games in the future but this is just a very little thought. Might as well learn some skills and create opportunity while I grind games lol.

      That's all I can think of right now.


      Edit: just remembered some funny story.

      My flatmate, I and the girl have been to some massive Entrepreneur meetup/ party. They go travel on some boat for 2 weeks or something and had partied in Barcelona the day before and we somehow joined. idk.
      Anyway, it was in some hotel, fucking packed with a couple 100 people. It obviously smlled like nerd but there were all sorts of almost young people girls, guys etc. everybody super talkative and smart. Lit.
      We found our spot and my girl was sitting on some couch, looking stunning and doing her instagram stuff while we were chatting to some people. Somehow I ended up in a conversation with some other girl, she looked like 28-33. I obviously mildly insult her and see what happens like I always do, she started qualifying herself and we had a nice chat with me occasionally dropping some bombs and I got the feeling she's more and more over me, probably talked to her for like 15 mins already, having fun etc and right when I saw she was getting it on after talking about some more flirty/ sexual stuff she asked me if I live with my flatmate etc and I was like "yea and also (name) is visiting me for a couple days, I met her in XYZ blabla"
      Her jaw dropped like HOOOOLLLYY shit it was so funny to see man xDDD

      we were standing side by side and she just blank starred infront of her fully stunned with some bewildered smile xDD

      that is why I do game... this was funny on so many levels haaa

      alright, peace!
      du bist einfach so ein menschenverachtender Volltrottel. Hf mit deinen 100K, vllt schämst du dich in 10 Jahren genau wie 9/10 Lesern hier für deine Beträge du sicker Gamer^^^^^^

      The post was edited 4 times, last by lust1germolch ().

    • yo yesterday went not too bad, 4 hours poker, and 4 hours theory and setting up solves etc.
      after that went out for an hour but didn't approach any gurl lol.
      du bist einfach so ein menschenverachtender Volltrottel. Hf mit deinen 100K, vllt schämst du dich in 10 Jahren genau wie 9/10 Lesern hier für deine Beträge du sicker Gamer^^^^^^
    • I have not been grinding that much but I have been putting in some hours into poker last week. I really have a problem with video games and I kept relapsing over the last days from playing occasionall to playing way too much so I had to fully quit now.
      It's fun for the first 2/3 of time I'm playing but then I just know it's not adding any value to my life anymore but I just keep playing and can't quit. I think the best option is to just quit it completely and cut off anything videogames related. I love to grind out some games sometimes but my future will be way better if I can even manage to not play video games for one year.
      The last 2 days I spent little time with things that use a lot energy, just to recharge. Kinda detoxing myself from this shit :D
      Anyway after 2 days doing nothing I feel some motivation again to get my life back together. I don't know why it was so hard this time but I'm sure I can do without videogames for 2-3 months and then some cravings will kick in, I ran through this process probably about 5-10 times in the last 5 years so I already know what's coming and I'm just in the process of setting up some plan to not relapse.

      can't wait to look back on this post in a year and thanking myself for this decision.

      LETS GO!
      du bist einfach so ein menschenverachtender Volltrottel. Hf mit deinen 100K, vllt schämst du dich in 10 Jahren genau wie 9/10 Lesern hier für deine Beträge du sicker Gamer^^^^^^
    • short update on whats going on
      -didn't play any video games and avoided anything videogame related. Sometimes it's super hard tho but I just remind myself of what can be possible when I don't play video games for a year.
      -put in a good amount of volume into grinding and theory
      -did some random workouts but gonna get them into my schedule more regularly
      -didn't go out and talk to chicks at all. I'll worry about that once I'm on top of my shit in poker, it's not that fun anyway if you suck at handling your life lol. So gonna do that quite irregular, just when it fits

      the grind is not going super well so far buuuut I'll figure it out :)

      Happy new year fuckers!
      du bist einfach so ein menschenverachtender Volltrottel. Hf mit deinen 100K, vllt schämst du dich in 10 Jahren genau wie 9/10 Lesern hier für deine Beträge du sicker Gamer^^^^^^
    • New

      Yo what's up still downswinging a bit. It's annoying. In the last days I discovered that I had big problems focussing when I was grinding or doing theory which really triggered me to finally read Deep Work by Cal Newport, obv great book, I absorbed it in 2 days. Exactly what I needed at this time.
      Rest is going great I'm going to the beach to do bodyweight exercises every other day and I feel insanely good because of that. When I go to work out it's just the perfect first 3 hours of the day:
      35 min walking to the calisthenics park where I can listen to audible while I walk through palms and sun
      2 hours body weight training, learning some new skills, getting some fresh air in from the sea and getting lots of sun in
      35 min walk back where I can again listen to audible or talk to some chicks. Daaamnnn I will miss Barcelona hahaha
      for those who care, I do the recommended routine from r/bodyweightfitness

      Now plz poker upswing, need maney :)
      du bist einfach so ein menschenverachtender Volltrottel. Hf mit deinen 100K, vllt schämst du dich in 10 Jahren genau wie 9/10 Lesern hier für deine Beträge du sicker Gamer^^^^^^