60 day challenge continued to NL100 grind

    • @yamiyami No nothing bad at all, thanks for your concern. On the contrary though, something really good. But I'm not prepared to share it yet.

      My posts will look a bit different now, might not be interesting to you gus so much anymore. But I will do it to self reflect, capture certain things and hopefully you might learn something useful from it as well.

      My mind refused to think ahead, refused to get back into the rational world. I wanted to continue just observing, just staying in the moment. It's the first time this happened to me. Still as I'm writing this I feel light. I got a bit addicted to that feeling, the feeling of being bodiless. As I'm writing this I felt the urge to stand up cuple of times and just look at the trees, the branches moving. Sounds irretated me before but now they are calming me down. I have the confidence to face loneliness now. I'd like to observe it, to see it's nothing bad, to enjoy it. But it's not time for that yet. I notice how I wait, all the time, just wait from one thing to the other. Right now I'm waiting to get a meal, not thinking what exists after that and also not really thinking about now, just waiting to pass. When I'll finish the meal Ill find something else to wait for. When will this waiting end? When I'm successful, when it'll be sunny outside again? No. I will wait no more. When I look pass it I see an eternety of moments, moments that are not important right now, moments I will miss if I keep waiting. I'm not scared of eternity anymore, I feel relieved I don't ahve to think about it anymore. I made a huge progress since June 2015, but prior to now I was ignoring the signs that were yelling how much my subconscious has done already, signs that were telling me that I couldn't have done it better, signs that put me right there at the top alongside the best. I just need some time and tinkering.
    • Well for now I can say I'll be playing NL100 so that rake doesn't affect me so much. Right now we're still in the process of setting up all the sites and basically I record myself playing vs different villains so he can see where my weak spots are. And we had 2 coachings where we went over some theory about diff sizings on diff boards and some lines I haven't been doing before etc. I have to grind some more and on Wed we'll review everything and start focusing on leaks.

      See ya
    • Hey guys,

      I decided to be really selfish for the time being. I will (try to) no longer share small tips and trics I learn along the way although sometimes
      I get a creative thought/implement it and if it works I'm so proud that makes me want to share. In my heart I love sharing and teaching but
      at the moment, for the first time in my life I feel the need to be quiet, listen and learn instead of babbling all around. Besides that
      poker is getting tougher every month and I really do believe I have an above average approach/mindset to it all so don't really want to expose
      everything since I see many people reading blogs/implementing other peoples ideas and being a lot better because of it. Now why I'm not
      successful yet and why should anyone read my blog let alone implement ideas of a bum is another story but it's just what I feel right now.

      Now that doesn't mean I won't be putting out some good info it's just that it won't be speciffic. Because one great thing I learned, and this
      will be the last hint I give out, is that all the info is out there, people just don't believe it can be so easy so they don't implement the stuff
      successful people write on blogs.

      Now I do have something remarkable (for me) to share.

      Since I was having a lot of doubts/scary thoughts lately that didn't seem to go away I looked into it because I didn't wanna get consumed by it.
      At first my counter strategy was to block them out and replace them with positive thoughts. As soon as I felt anxiety/nervousness/frustration or
      some self distructing thoughts like "will I make it?" I started thinking of the things I do better than others, of the things I'm grateful for
      and things I learned on which I can improve on in the future. It worked fine.

      Then I heared for another approach which was basically just to observe it. Meditate on it. In some book later on I found out they even
      recommend letting the negative thoughts flow and write it down and later on objectively look at it. However I didn't really like this
      approach. Felt it's not for me. I pulled out one useful thing though but it's too specific.

      So with this knowledge convinced that there is no 3rd option I turned to my friend and asked him which of this two options he normally used
      to confront doubts etc. and I was ASTONISHED. He told me his exact thought process and I saw him actually that he couldn't comprehend
      why any of my other 2 options would be good and why would anyone use them. Basically he never thought of this two option because he never
      had doubts. WHAT? People say, even successful ones like everyone has doubts/insecurities it's just that successful ones don't put attention
      to them. At least that's what I believed til that moment.

      But this guy had non even when he was in situations that would make most men crumble. I'll share his story since it'll help understand the point
      and also it's so amazing that it's worth sharing. He was barely making it in school, like myself but he knew he has something more within,
      school was about to end and when it was time for college he refused to go. Obv he couldn't sit at home and do nothing so out fo the blue he
      decided to be the youngest one to go around the world by bike. He trained for 2 months w/ my heavy fucked up bike. He fell one day and got stiches
      all over his face. And my bike was stolen ont he spot when he was taken to the hospital. He had to rest 1 month. Then he had to stay out of the sun
      for 3 more months. He could quit right there on the spot. He trained 2 months in the living room. Then it was time to go otherwise he couldn't make it
      and he was already 2 months behind schedule. So he cycled to Spain where he almost overstretched one of his leg muscles so he cycled 3 days w/ only one leg.

      Then he got to Australia where it was 40 degrees celsius every day and he had to cycle during the night. Then to New Zeland when ozon layer is the thinest
      and he had to use insane amounts of sun cream and only cycle some amount of the day. Then he came to Thailand where he had visa problems and was facing jail time.
      Then he ran out of money and slept in peoples barns and ate one chicken or one nutella/day. Then some weired sort of birds started attacking him. Then he came to India.
      Traffic was chaothic. He was getting fine after fine because of driving on highways but he couldn't pay it. Then he got typhus. He was puking all day, shitting all night.
      But while on antibiothics still managed to put in 140km/day. People tried to rob him etc.

      And the other time he told me he never had a single doubt that he'll make it.

      HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?

      He knew deep down that he owes this to himself and his father. He knew that simply there is no other way. Because a world where he doesn't make it does not exist.
      This journey was him basically. He believed there's no world in which he doesn't finish it. Because if he didn't finish it this wouldn't really be himself.

      So in every moment when something "bad" happened he said he never though why me what if etc. but always what now? where do I go from here? What can I do to improve and to make it?
      He was acting like he knows 100% he'll make it, this were just some small obstacles due to which he had to adapt a bit. He doesn't understand self pity or negative thoughts because he
      doesn't have any. He was constantly looking "where to go from here/what now" objectively. He was in the moment 100%.

      When you're in a state where you simply know that you have to do/get over something otherwise it'll be contradictory with
      your core values only then you will do unimaginable things.

      ----

      My trivial example of it:

      Deep down I know I'm a honest and reliable person. Integrity is one of my top core values.

      If we say the deal is 50/50 the deal is 50/50. The world in which I would scam you does not exist just like the world for my friend to not finish didn't.

      So again. Only when you're aligned with you're core values you will achieve what you want.

      p.s. his link: tomazhumarbike.com/
    • Sun is life. Life is movement.

      This two things have an enormous impact on my life. It's sunny today and with it a new hope has risen.

      I noticed I work better if I write. It takes a bit more of my time but it's definitely worth it. So I decided to write again, every day.

      I see how even if I make huge progress on some days I feel bad. That's why I'm going to write out every day in the morning what I need to do in order to consider that day a win.

      I believe this will enable me to find peace. Besides that I just realized that winter is downtime for me and I should accept that my body/mind won't be able to perform on such high levels as they do in summer, this alone calmes me down a bit.

      I feel very optimisthic today hence this post.

      I will consider today a WIN if I do all of the below:

      Wim Hof method
      no TV, no sweets/snacks
      enough water(0.5l in the morning)
      eat normal sized lunch
      meditate
      pullup program
      extreme bumhunt 8h
      extreme attention-no distractions, take time for decisions
      implement new lines
      study Kd8d6h spot
      standup more-do handstands-listen to music/podcasts
    • When I woke up sun was shining so it was pure pleasure to do the wim hof method outside.

      Although I seem to do something wrong because I had better results in the first half of the first week(day one 2m15s w/o air in lungs) but then it all went downwards regarding results(struggling for 2m). I will watch week 2 video tmrw and try to imitate Wim as much as I can. Also normally I do 40 pushups but with his breathing method should do 50 then or so but can only do 30.

      Besides that I've been meditating now for 2 weeks str8 10min/day although I should have put more attention to it because I feel like I'm not 100% focused.

      I ate good, lots of meet, egs and milk. Also did day 1 of pullup program; 5 sets maximum reps 90sec rest; I got action while doing it so had to take a short break, results 11 7 - 20min break 10 7 5; I've gained some weight and lost some strength and my form is pure(no swinging, no helping with legs, ful range of motion) but in 2 months I should be at 20.

      I put in 7h bumhunt hours or so but got 3.5h action like 350 hands so I said it's enough. I played well for the most part, also picked opponents but variance wan't in my favour so I'm like half BI down I guess, 1BI since I've started NL100. But only got 1.5k hands in so it's nothing. And it's not important anyways.

      I had this little crisis at like 5pm where I studied some spots in some program but felt overwhelmed with it all so my mind started thinking like u spent 3h and u haven't got one adaptation that could make you money in the future, this will take forever to figure out, if u don't drastically change your game you will stay broke and seems like this could take years to master, also I don't even know how much is it worth if I'm doing it vs villain after 80 hands where I have no clue of his tendecies in some spots that need to be asigned etc. So I decided to meditate on it and felt better afterwards.

      Now that I think clearly things might be easier than I thought in the beginning, I've spent good amount of hours working on it in past 2 days and see an improvement it's just that I picked lots of hard spots in the beginning like 3bp, turn donk, prbT check call river etc.

      I have a lot to figure out but I feel a bit better and have a sense that I'm going forward. I studied 3 spots and have lots of questions.

      And since I downloaded some beta version it's crushing so need to email suppport.

      One thing though that was a mood killer today was that my dream is to succeed in poker, travel, get ripped etc. for a few years but then I wanted to attend college for teachers in public schools and study everything there is on teaching since it's what I love and I believe I have a feel for but then I plan on opening a private school but I found out how hard that is considering all the rules the state gives you so I don't know if it's even possibe cuz the state servants or w/e need to approve you but w/ my radical changes they'd never do that so I'm not sure. Also teachers college takes 5 years w/ 2-3 months break meaning if I attend it next year all my traveling/living freely goes down the toiled. But that's the only college I'm interested on going to so not sure. I know for a fact that if I have three 1-2k months prior to the application due in August I'm not attending it but rather focus 100% on poker to become 10k player and I can pay 5k/year for the college in next years anyways. So yeah. I won't rush it. One win/day at a time. Whatever happens I'll accept it and make the best out of it. It's not too bad to be here in SLO actually I have a great gf and friends but the grass is always greener they say. Also one thing I'm grateful a lot is that it's peace here. People here like majority is saying that if Trump wins we're facing WW3. Don't knwo anything about it but thinking I'd have to fight for someone elses ideals and couldn't do whatever I like in next years makes me puke.

      My coaching is going fine, thanks.
    • I will consider today a WIN if I do all of the below:

      Wim Hof method
      no TV, no sweets/snacks
      enough water(0.5l in the morning)
      eat normal sized lunch
      meditate
      pullup program
      extreme bumhunt 8h
      extreme attention-no distractions, take time for decisions
      preapare questions
      study 3bp Q64 A 7 spot
      standup more-do handstands-listen to music/podcasts

      The program is working now and I've already worked and learned some great things, found huge leaks. Starting the day positive.
    • dovrha wrote:

      Wim Hof method
      no TV, no sweets/snacks
      enough water(0.5l in the morning)
      eat normal sized lunch
      meditate
      pullup program
      extreme bumhunt 8h
      extreme attention-no distractions, take time for decisions
      preapare questions
      study 3bp Q64 A 7 spot
      standup more-do handstands-listen to music/podcasts

      Well, where do you take the motivation for all this? I mean, it's really cool and I would love to be that consitent when it comes to my goals but somehow I can't :( Any tips you can share to improve this skill?
    • I could give you all kinds of advice on what to change but if there's one thing I could say to you is this:

      Find your purpose. When people feel they're a part of a bigger plan, that what they do is important and matters, that's where real motivation comes from at least in my experience.

      People often say better life, more money, traveling, freedom etc. is not motivating enough and it really isn't if u wanna be a high achiever I'd say. You must something within you that will ignite some deep emotions.

      My case for example:

      I'm tired of not finishing things/projects/goals, I've quit in the middle of something too many times and so this is something that is strong enough and resonates deep within me that keeps me going.

      Or like the poker thing, I could have quit so many times already but what keeps me going is knowledge that poker is a part of a bigger picture in my life and without is all my further plan colapse.

      So yeah I don't know your situation but aren't you tired of not being consistent? Aren't u craving for that feeling of achievement? Or the day that you'll be able to say, no not me, I did it, I'm a high performer. And aren't you sick of the wondering what could have been etc. and that feeling of underachievement when u know you could do better. The thing is you have to DECIDE that you're HIGH ACHIEVER! This is the most important thing. If you keep thinking oh I'd love to be consistent this implies that you aren't right now and you probably won't become one until you change the belief. And guess what. You can change it right now, in this very moment, that little high consistent performes is hiding in yourself already just let him out, sure you'll start and fail start and fail but every moment is a new opportunity to start again, to prove youself, once you'll start doing it you won't be able to stop. What goes in motion stays in motion, it's logic. So just start. But remember to forget the mindset of I WILL but start thinking I AM. Now what would a high performer do right now in your position? go do that.

      ps. also it might be that your goal setting si not correct which could be stoping you down. One thing to add here would be stop thinking of goal but start thinking in targets. If we fail to meet a goal we're sad and dissapointed, if we miss a target, hey tomorrow is a new day to try again. So just change the mindset. Because all goals simply can't be met because of poor planning, uncertenties, our ther factors that weren't preapred for so just look at it as a target and if u miss start again til u reach it.

      The post was edited 1 time, last by dovrha ().

    • Balkan music was playing later today. What this means is that today was a fucking win.

      Woke up pretty late, did the wim hof method, still I think I'm not in the moment enough when doing it but planning on focusing even more on it to get better results. I did 50 pushups though today and with his technique I feel my muscles have more power.

      Then I watched one epizode of death in paradize counsciously so it's not a bad thing and I was still feeling kind of bad/unmotivated and I had internet problems so I went to sleep for 2h. After that I did pullups, ate and meditated for 15min. It was one of the really focused meditations in a long time now(few days). I took care of some other stuff regarding poker, learned some new things and it was time to open up the tables. I bumhunted only 3h or so and got 1h action and played my A+ game, made liek 20€ and that was it. It's 3.30am still have tables open will see if I get any good action but ... main thing is even when I felt like shit I did the daily tasks, I did play and best part is I had two HUGE mental wins today.

      1) I figured out the college thing. I will probably apply for a history teacher, it takes 3.5-4.5 years and then u can teach history in schools/colleges or do some other history related ocupations but I don't care about that

      What this does is that I have something to look forward to, I don't see college as failure now and I don't feel the rush to make it with poker since I know I have lots of good years ahead and feel a bit of weight has been lifted off my shoulders

      2) The only goal I have right now is to keep up with the good habits and be better every week/day. I see how I'm building momentum. One big difference from now and few months back s that even on bad days I keep doing the daily tasks. I know I could fall back into old habits quickly if I dont' focus so I have to be careful. Also I've changed my warmup routine and it's much better now, I also made some other adjustments in meta game that help a lot so basically I'm mostly going to focus on the mental part of the game this month, to master it, get it in blood and know it by heart. I see how much this aspect helps my game and how a few little twicks make tons of difference so it's all I'll focus on. I feel I don't care about the money so much anymore. I believe if I do the things I've set out the money will come cravling back to me soon anyways.

      Plan tmrw:

      morning routine
      meditation
      warmup-video, what to be mindful of
      play
      small lunch
      call the college
      send some files to a friend
      maybe afternoon sleep
      wimhof
      warmup-video, what to be mindful of
      (play, maybe pickup gf, rewatch some vid, think what to do on downtime)
    • Woke up 12pm, mediated, cold shower etc. started playing in 1h I got exhausted since there were lots of poeple coming and going so I took a break.

      Sun was shining again so went to play some one on one basketball which ended up being a blood battle which I won but I was really tired so went to sleep again but we had some visitors with kids and it was so noisy when I woke up was even more tired but did Wim Hof and pullups etc. prepared myself a nice chicken and vegetables dinner and started playing around midnight. played 2h made 2BI which is great and now I'm here.

      It was a pretty good day cuz finished all the tasked, played Agame even when I didn't really feel like it and avoided some bad habits.

      I'm not sure whether I should play during the day or the night, still have to figure this out.

      Next three days will be crucial cuz my gf comes and I need to stay focused and hard working.

      Other than that this week is 100% better than llast one, I'm gonna do wim hof 7 times, did 5 times last week .. I'm getting better now w/ cold showers and everything really feel improvement. I''m also eating right, mediating, not givinig in when I feel bad etc.

      I have to keep it up, and one thing I'd like to improve is poker. I need to play a bit more and do the mental game stuff even more focused when playing, and not doing pullups when waiting for action.

      Plan tmrw:

      morning routine
      wim hof
      warmup-video, what to be mindful of
      play
      pick up gf
      go from there

      One thing though is also that I need to work on my game a bit. Memorize some std lines and design some river ranges so maybe I'll take one day to do that.

      Since I started NL100 I'm -1BI and made 1BI in RB so b/e .. but I believe w/ good mental prep, bit better work ethic, and a little work on my game I'm in for a good month.
    • What to do better next week?

      Continue pullups/mediation/wim hof. Be more present when doing it. Mindset of go deep, feel it, learn it instead of something I need to do. Visualize prior doing it, say it out loud, focus.

      Pokerwise:

      Change work time to morning.

      !Do the mental prep.!+one implementation at a time(take time, think of ranges)->next week goal

      Design some more ranges. (Remember some old spots) Review how to play that villain.

      Bumhunt more-8h/day

      General:

      Buy some good food but don't spend in restaurants

      Be mindful of what to do while down time(standup more, handstands, stretch, ab wheel, keep mental prep in mind, music etc.)
    • Yesterday:

      9am woke up
      9-9.30 mediation, cold shower
      9.30-14.30 playing
      14.30-15.00 lunch
      15.00-16.30 sleep
      16.30-17.30 wim hof method
      17.30-20.30 playing
      20.30-21.00 pullups+drink shake
      21.00-22.00 Watching Hitlers rise
      30min break-chatting with gf
      22.30-01.00 playing around with CREV

      I bumhunted 8h, played a bit less than 6h out of that action was good. Don't know how I did don't check pt4. Plus theory work I worked on poker a bit more than 10h. Meditation, pullups, wim hof I worked on myself 1.5h+I decided to watch history stuff instead of BS TV series so pretty good. I'm making huge progress outside of progress. I rised my pullups in one week for 2 reps. My meditation are getting deeper, I was listening to guided meditation bashar appreciate your existance the other time and I felt some tears, not to mention wim hof I hold breath now 3m30sec and I started feeling some weird things like hearning noises and getting cramps etc. which is normal I just didn't have it before I think I finally learned how to breathe correctly. So today I woke up even one hour before and will try to repeat everything.

      @yamiyami Well I'd love to have more time for sure but I'm in a spot where I need to make it but even so this planned day and knowing I've been productive gives me confidance, it gives me pleasure, to look back and see what I did and when I do take a break I know I deserve it. Although lately I don't feel I deserve a break no matter how much I work since I wanna have a + month first.